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Tuesday, 17 November 2009

Time appears to be stopped.

A wise man once sang, “But if the world could remain within a frame, like a painting on a wall, then I think we'd see the beauty then and stand staring in awe.” I don’t believe I’ve heard anything more depict of my own dreams and aspirations. To be forever captured in some form, untouched by time, is something of great beauty. So much can be shown from a simple picture – emotion, heart, soul. All of these moments in our lives can be easily forgotten, but I feel compelled to portray my ideas and experiences in a definite record. My dream is to go into a career that indulges itself in this view, video production and editing, or something of that nature.

First things first, I’m not exactly the nicest guy on the planet. I’m blunt, judgmental, and very picky when it comes to how I express my opinions. If you read that back to yourself, you’ll realize that a lot of people in any visual art department are the same way. Odd as they may seem, most creative people are very open to expression and experimental ideas, allowing them to see the world in a different light. I’ve always been a little ahead of the curve when it came to creativity and originality, able to comprehend and produce ideas that might seem difficult to others. Usually, I find myself at a loss for words, as we all do from time to time. Compared to composition, cinematography shows depth, a 3D model of human emotions rather than thinking of words to say. A camera can pick up on those moments where words are not needed, what a book cannot describe.

A good poet can never write a masterpiece without inspiration – and my inspirations come from my friends and family. We can all think of that one friend who laughs too much, or that one uncle who could really use a shower, or even that employee at Movie Gallery who picks out really bad movies for you. These are all parts of our lives and, realize it or not, they are our inspirations. This is why I want to pursue my dream – to capture, not only the human nature, but my inspirations as well. If you were able to record video just by looking, imagine what things you would be able to rewind and watch – a heart wrenching breakup, your first kiss, the time your friend laughed so hard that he pee’d his pants. I see it this way: these people brought me where I am today, they have made me who I am today, and they are why I am here. My friends and family have all brought me to this point in my life.

It’s one thing to see a picture of a setting sun, but there’s something moving about watching it; a lonesome old man feeding birds, or a couple walking in the park, or a mother tending to a tiny, bruised finger. There is just something about sight that makes it easier for us to relate our emotions. Video cameras are such an incredible tool in the right hands, freezing time and life forever on a screen.

We are cautioned that life is short. Photographs will remain. Video footage will remain. Your essays, journals, poetry, and fiction will all remain. They will all live long after we’ve passed. Your memories will be kept alive through these means. Your life projected on a television. It’s beautiful, really. It would seem that time can be stopped, and all you need is a camera.

“We would stand staring in awe at our still lives posed like a bowl of oranges.”

Thursday, 20 August 2009

Third Day of College.

So I went to piss last night

It was perhaps the worst decision in my entire life.

Anyway.

There was a tiger inside the stall

And I was like "shit, son"

Like, if you skinned a tiger, this is what you'd have

Only it had googly eyes

And it was pretty intimidating if you didn't know what the hell was going on

Yeah. It was a faux lion skin

Well, I come out laughing

And I meet up with some of the other guys and talk about it

Turns out some guy walked in wearing it, pissed, and left if there as he walked out. He apparently never came back to get it

Anyway

It was about four guys standing in the hall

And we were talking about the fucking lion

Then suddenly

These two guys come outside like something's wrong

Anthony and Keith

And they start to tell the most epic story in the history of my college life (3 days)

Anyway

They tell the tale of Corissa: A super slut who goes around sucking every dick in town

I'm pretty sure that's a Morehead fact. A lot of people know about it

They describe her as a short, chubby, glasses wearing chronic smoker

I didn't believe them

So by this time, Alex and about three other guys come out

The RA is either passed out or just doesn't care. I mean, it was pretty loud

So apparently, like 20 minutes before I pissed, they were outside talking to her

They bet her 5 bucks to suck the next guy's dick that walks around the corner

First guy comes

"Do you swallow?"

"Um... yeah"

"Do you stroke the balls?"

"Sure"

"...what the hell are you doing? Fuck you."

The next guy doesn't even look at her. He just says "fuck off"

Third guy. Oh man

Turns out it's Keith's roommate (the guy talking to Corissa)

Alright. So a plan forms

She's like "wanna go fuck somewhere?"

And he looks at Keith. He nods

They go to the back of the parking lot

And this is how they described the scene:

She was on her knees, all squated over. He was standing straight and looking over at us. We were doing ninja shit, movin around and shit (dramatically rolls on the floor)

This is where Keith starts to worry about his roommate. I mean, the girl is sweating STDs. The roommate gives a wink over to Keith and Anthony. She pulls off her shorts. And she's not wearing any underwear. The smell was apparently so horrid, it made the roommate hesitate on this decision.

He's like "fuck this shit" and runs back to the dorm

She's chasing him saying "You bast'rd!" slapping at him

And we're dying in the hallway. I don't think I've laughed like that in a long long time

I mean, it was funny

And so they finish the story and we meet the (now) legend roommate

And he's all cool and like "yeah, if you see her, I'm not here"

We were completely unaware of how quickly this happened

And a guy came up the hall whenever the roommate went back to his room

I don't remember his name

But we decide to fill him in on what he just missed

And in the middle of the story, he's like, "Oh... you mean the girl that just asked me to fuck her in the lobby?"

And then it dawned on us

Everyone slowly turned toward the stairwell door

And there she fucking was

And she's like pacing toward us

And it was like a movie

"Oh FUCK!"

And then there's a thousand little clicks of doors locking

And then for 20 minutes there's nothing but screaming and banging on doors

Nothing was seen

Just horrible, horrible yelling

"Come out here right fucking now!" "No! Go away!" "I'll fucking sit here all day" "Uh, no you won't, bitch. I'll go and call the RA" "Go fuck your ass!" "Bitch, I'm not afraid of hitting you"

It was horrifying

UPDATE:

The next morning, I woke up to piss. Yet another awful decision on my part. (I might not pee ever again)
A plate of old spaghetti was lying in front of Anthony’s door, his dry erase board was all scribbled on.

Later on that night, there was some commotion in the hall. Turns out, the RA, the girls 4^th floor RA, and the main boss man were pissed about what happened. They took all of our dry erase boards and questioned Keith and Anthony.

I expect a hall meeting sometime tonight. Also, we moved the lion to our room.

Sunday, 10 May 2009

Conversations at 4:00 AM

"Okay, that's like when you're drinking hot soup. If someone's right next to you, you're going to say, "Oh, damn! I just burnt my tongue!"Why? Because someone is there to hear it. What do you do when you're alone? Usually nothing. Do you really say, "Ouch! My tongue!" when there's nobody around you? Probably not."

Saturday, 25 April 2009

Talk about Pluggage.

Okay, honestly, I've never been so annoyed with these random little ads that Xanga sells out. People can just buy space on your blog and say whatever the hell they want - seriously, anyone.

This unbearable annoyance is what I'm talking about. Refresh your page a few times and you'll see her. Why, you may ask, did she make that skin-crawling face? Or the oh-so-awesome smiley face?

Xanga. Stop selling yourself out to people like this.

Saturday, 04 April 2009

Something from the movies.

Alright, so we own some strips of land in Lawrence County. We've owned them for generations, really. My great grandparents lived there as well as my grandparents. It's all farm with few houses and a barn. Nice little place.

Earlier, my parents were down there, cleaning and whatnot. They found note lying on an old table. Mom says that it wasn't there a few weeks ago, as if it was placed there recently.

"Tonight, at the stroke of midnight, I shall get my revenge. I will make you pay the price for what your great grandpa did to my ancestors. I shall punish the third youngest child of the fourth generation of Bayes.

-Captain J.C. Bena (Bens?)"

Anyone else find that the creepiest fucking thing ever? The note itself is ancient, but Mom said they would've found it earlier if it had always been there. Who knows who wrote it. We've never known a J.C, let alone a Captain. The weirdest thing, it mentions the third youngest out of four generations, which would be my brother, Ethan.

It's like his death note. Or some lunatic's fantasy. Or just an old enemy of my grandparents rambling about nothing.

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Tom_Green_Impersonator

- Name: Chaz
- Birthday: 10/9/1990
- Gender: Male
- Member Since: 6/15/2005

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About Me

Hi. I'm Chaz. I'm a senior at a very small school in a very small city. Life here is rather unbearable sometimes. My colleagues and I often feel the obligation to "liven things up." Our shenanigans are worthy of a good campfire story. If you see us tying someone to a pole, don't call the cops.